


Bad Habits and The Impressionable Youth

by MaxMattel666



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: ARFID, Bad Decisions, Caffeine Addiction, Caffeine Withdrawal, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Found Family, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Minor Tendou Satori/Ushijima Wakatoshi, Not Beta Read, Protective Ushijima Wakatoshi, Smoking, Tendou Satori Needs a Hug, Underage Smoking, basically lmao, no explicit descriptions of an ED but hinted, ushijima wakatoshi and tendou satori are goshiki tsutomu's parents
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:01:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27844165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaxMattel666/pseuds/MaxMattel666
Summary: Goshiki starts picking up some of Tendou’s bad habits and it begins to worry Ushijima.
Relationships: Tendou Satori/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 153





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> I am so so sorry I haven't posted, I know it's literally been over a month and I feel so awful. School has been really hard and I've had a lot going on lately plus being in kind of a depressive episode definitely doesn't help. I know that this probably isn't the content a lot of you want to see from me (I know most of my viewers are subscribed for Yuri On Ice content and I promise it's coming please just be patient). If we are mutuals and I haven't messaged you back I am so sorry and I'm going to try to get around to it soon. Again, I'm really really sorry for being MIA lately. The next two weeks are exams but then I have break for a few weeks so I should be able to post more then. 
> 
> As a side note, thank you all so so much for 200,000 views! When I woke up and saw that the other morning I was literally almost in tears. I can't believe that so many people have read my fics (and hopefully enjoyed them!). If y'all have any requests please feel free to leave them down below in the comments.

Ushijima almost doesn’t believe his eyes when he walks into the dining hall. It’s just a little bit after practice and still too early for dinner, but Ushijima goes with the intention of grabbing some fruit and a cup of yogurt as a snack. A familiar figure catches his eye though as he notices Goshiki sitting at a table by himself. Sometimes people would go to the cafeteria to study, as it was on the first floor of their dorm building which meant they didn’t have to leave like if they wanted to go study at the library. It’s not uncommon for Ushijima to find Goshiki studying there, although usually he was joined by at least one other member of the volleyball team. Today he is alone though and instead of his usual plate of apple slices and peanut butter, there is an aluminum can sitting next to his notebook. 

“Tsutomu,” Ushijima says. His tone is authoritative and makes Goshiki jerk back a little bit. “What are you drinking?” The third year asks, eyes narrowed. 

“Oh, nothing!” Goshiki babbles. The red can is still very visible on the table in front of him. 

“Tsutomu,” Ushijima says again, staring directly at the energy drink. Then he notices that the can is shaking, well, more like Goshiki’s hands are shaking. 

“Um.. a peach redbull?” Goshiki replies, awkwardly picking up the beverage and clutching it to his chest. 

“You need to eat a balanced meal, especially after practice. You know that,” Ushijima reprimands. The scene in front of him that he has seen all too often, except usually it’s his boyfriend nursing an energy drink, not Goshiki. 

“I- I know. I’m sorry, I’m just really tired from this afternoon and I have a paper that I have to finish for tomorrow,” the first year attempts to explain. 

“Did you get an energy drink because you’ve seen Satori drinking them?” 

“What? Oh um, no, not really…” Goshiki mumbles, looking down at the red bull in his hands. 

“Hmm,” Ushijima grumbles. 

He can tell that Goshiki is lying, which is obvious. The first year may idolize Ushijima on the court, but most of the time he is actually following Tendou around like a little duckling that has imprinted on him. Goshiki clings to Tendou fiercely because Tendou had been the first person to ever really nurture him. In many ways, they take care of one another. Tendou cuts Goshiki’s bangs and paints his nails and gives him advice for his dates with Koganegawa. Goshiki reads Shonen Jump and plays video games with Tendou and shows his senpai that he really isn’t a monster at all, because to Goshiki, Tendou is his person. The two are incredibly close and their relationship isn’t something that Ushijima wants to challenge, but it irks him to see his boyfriend’s bad habits starting to rub off on their protege. 

Tendou has plenty of bad habits, as most people in fact do. But Ushijima on the other hand, is someone of very few vices. Tendou consumes a lot of caffeine, usually in the form of energy drinks but coffee sometimes too. He stays up late and doesn’t sleep much, leaving him with dark undereye circles most days. He picks his nails and forgets to brush his teeth and these are all things that Ushijima notices but never says anything more than a nudge in the right direction because he loves Tendou unconditionally, flaws and all. Ushijima recognizes that these habits are not the greatest, but that is just how Tendou is. But now Tendou’s habits aren’t only affecting himself, but their underclassman who they are responsible for looking after. And it shocks the ace to see the effect of the energy drink on Goshiki, whose hands are shaking and eyes look slightly bloodshock. Ushijima feels taken aback by the jittery sight when he realizes that that is what is going through Tendou’s body every day, multiple times a day. 

~

Ushijima sighs as he enters his and Tendou’s shared dorm room. He closes the door quietly behind him and walks over to the bunk bed where Tendou is splayed out on his stomach on the bottom mattress. A textbook and highlighter lay neglected in front of the redhead as he flips idly through a manga. 

“Hey Toshi,” Tendou hums happily without looking up from his book. 

“Hello Satori,” Ushijima greets back. There’s a prolonged pause and Tendou looks up at his boyfriend oddly, because usually Ushijima sits down at his desk right away after coming back from the gym. 

Ushijima clears his throat and leans awkwardly against the frame of the bunk bed. “Do you know what I found Goshiki doing today?” The ace says out of the blue. 

“Uh, no, I don’t know,” Tendou shrugs, making a confused face as he looks up to meet Ushijima’s eyes. “What? Was he like, trying to sneak Koganegawa in or something? Bring a frog up to his room?” The redhead laughs. 

“No, he was drinking an energy drink,” Ushijima answers bluntly. 

“Oh,” Tendou mumbles quietly, his eyes going wide in realization. His eyes shift away from Ushijima and back down to his manga. 

“Your bad habits are rubbing off on him,” Ushijima says firmly. “You should have seen how his hands were shaking.” 

“Excuse me?” Tendou asks with one eyebrow raised. He moves to sit up on the bed, pulling his legs underneath him and settling his hands in his lap “It’s not like I bought it for him or anything,” Tendou chuckles. 

“You know how impressionable Tsutomu is,” Ushijima counters, crossing his arms over his chest. Tendou does know that Goshiki looks up to him, but he had never considered that Goshiki might pick up some of his habits. 

“Fine, fine. I’ll try to cut back. At least in front of Tsutomu,” Tendou rings his hands nervously in his lap as he speaks. 

“Okay,” Ushijima sighs. The conversation isn’t going how the ace wants it to go, but he isn’t sure what else to say to Tendou. He figures that he has at least gotten his point across. The two boys leave it at that. 

~

Dinner that night seems far more tense than any dinner the team has shared before. Usually they all eat together and tonight is no exception but there is an awkward air that sits over the table. Ushijima sits at the head of the table like he always does. Tendou flanks his left side while Goshiki sits next to Tendou. Ushijima’s plate is a well balanced mix of rice, meat, and grilled vegetables. 

Next to him, Tendou’s own portion is meager. There is rice on his plate that looks like it has been doused in far too much soy sauce, a bowl of some sort of soup and two chocolate pudding cups. It’s not much but it is better than Tendou’s typical dinner of an energy drink and one of the cafeteria’s premade sandwiches. However, Ushijima eyes his boyfriend’s plate like it isn’t much of an improvement because after all, it still isn’t what he would consider anywhere near a balanced meal. 

Ushijima’s gaze bounces from Tendou’s plate to Goshiki’s, which is better, but not by much. His plate consists of rice and beef curry and there’s a side of carrot sticks on his tray as well. He looks tired though, like he needs some sort of pick me up that he hadn’t seemed to have needed in the past. Tendou on the other hand, looks far worse. His eyes are droopy as he takes small bites of his rice. There is an annoyed look on his face as he eats his food slowly, eyes shifting between the food in front of him and the food on his boyfriend’s tray. Ushijima eats unbothered, not making much conversation as the rest of the team eat their meals and chat idly, pretending to ignore the awkward energy radiating down from the other end of the table. 

“I’m really full,” Tendou says quietly to himself, setting his chopsticks down to rest. He has gotten through one and a half of his pudding cups and eaten maybe about a third of his rice, but not more. He shifts uncomfortably in his chair, feeling a little nauseous from the headache he has. 

“You should eat more,” Ushijima speaks up, nodding at the middle blocker’s unfinished plate. 

“I’m full,” Tendou repeats, pushing his tray away from him. The tone of his voice is slightly agitated and Goshiki looks up from his own plate with wide eyes with instant concern. 

“Satori you should really-” 

“I said I’m fine,” Tendou grumbles, looking over the ace. 

The rest of the team is looking at them now and Tendou can feel their eyes on the back of his head. He is so tired and he just wants an energy drink of even some coffee, or chocolate ice cream. He wants something that will make him feel better and his dinner just isn’t doing that. He can feel the crankiness seeping out into his voice but he can’t help it. His head hurts and his eyes feel dry and he thinks about the homework he has to do before he can go to bed and he lets out a frustrated huff. 

“I need to get started on my homework,” Tendou sighs. He pushes his chair back from the table, stands up, and promptly clears his tray. 

The rest of the team goes quiet as players exchange glances of concern and unease. Ushijima notices the sudden shift in energy upon Tendou’s departure but he doesn’t comment on it. Goshiki sneaks a worried glance over at his senpai, but Ushijima doesn’t notice. The normal dinner chatter picks up again a few minutes later and Ushijima reoccupies himself with his meal, but Goshiki is left feeling uneasy and finds himself staring at the vacant seat across the table from him. Usually Tendou doesn’t eat a real dinner, but even so he almost always stays until everyone is done. On top of that, most nights Goshiki follows Tendou back to his and Ushijima’s room so that he can do his homework in a quiet place and ask for help when he needs it. But this night is different because not only does Tendou leave early, he leaves without Ushijima and without Goshiki. 

When everyone is done eating, Goshiki hovers awkwardly by Ushijima’s side for a few moments. He plays with his fingers idly, just like Tendou as he anxiously waits for Ushijima to say something, perhaps even invite him over to do homework and uphold their usual school night routine. Except Ushijima doesn’t extend an invitation, instead he says his goodnights to the rest of the team and heads back to his dorm room alone. 

Ushijima considers a few things on the short walk back to his and Tendou’s room. While Ushijima hadn’t picked up on the energy shift at dinner, he was aware that something seemed different about his boyfriend. Usually Tendou cracks jokes with their teammates and asks the underclassmen about their days. But that evening he had been quiet. Ushijima couldn’t decipher what else had been different about today compared to any other except for the conversation that he and Tendou had that afternoon, and so the ace felt it only right to apologize. 

He doesn’t hover outside the door to their shared room or even knock, instead Ushijima walks in like he would any other night. Tendou is perched up on the top bunk, already dressed in his pajamas. He has a textbook open in his lap but his eyes look a little glassy and as if he hadn’t been reading at all. 

“Satori,” Ushijima sighs as he goes to close the door behind him. Tendou gives a little hum, acknowledging the ace’s presence but he doesn’t 

“I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable at dinner. I just think it is very important for you to eat a well balanced diet and set a good example for our kouhai,” the captain explains. 

“You’re already a good enough example,” Tendou laughs a little bitterly, looking up from his textbook. 

“Tsutomu likes you more than me,” Ushijima states plainly. It is a fact anyways. “Thank you for not drinking an energy drink in front of him tonight.” 

“Yeah. Well, you’re welcome,” Tendou says, his voice a little softer now. 

Ushijima’s eyes flicker up to meet Tendou’s, but he can’t hold his gaze as the redhead’s shaking hands pull Ushijima’s attention away. He lets out a long exhale, “You should stop for your own health too, energy drinks are not good for your body.” 

“Okay, Wakatoshi,” Tendou sighs. “I told you I’ll try to cut back.”


	2. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry this has taken me so long to get out. I really don't have an excuse for why my content has been so lacking lately. I find myself having to apologize quite frequently for this, and I really hope that you guys aren't disappointed. If you have any suggestions for fics that you would like to see, please let me know. You can also reach me on any of my socials linked on my profile.

Things blow up only a few weeks later. 

Ushijima and Tendou are studying in their room like usual when Tendou asks the ace to grab his calculator from his desk. Ushijima agrees with a nod and crosses the room to where their desks are. Tendou’s desk is messy and disorganized, with papers strewn about across the top and the randomest things shoved into the drawers. Ushijima typically doesn’t mind it though because Tendou’s mess is usually confined to his own space. And the desk is not really messy so much as it is cluttered. The actual issue arises when Ushijima pulls open a drawer to look for Tendou’s calculator and instead finds a pack of cigarettes instead of a calculator on top of his notebooks. 

The wing spiker stares at the small carton for a few moments, unsure if it is what he thinks it is. He reaches out and picks up the cigarettes, turning the pack over in his hands to examine it. It’s out of the plastic packaging that cigarettes usually come in and it feels light, maybe about half empty. Ushijima has never touched a cigarette in his life and is well aware of the health consequences associated with smoking. He feels a hot wave of anger push through his chest as he stares down at the little red and white box. 

“Satori,” he says after clearing his throat loudly. 

Tendou immediately looks up from his textbook, startled by the uncharacteristic and accusatory tone in his boyfriend’s voice. Ushijima turns around and holds the cigarette pack out far from his body. Tendou’s eyes go wide as he’s met with the sight. 

“You’ve traded one bad habit for another,” Ushijima accuses as Tendou gapes at him from the bed. 

It’s a logical conclusion to Ushijima. Tendou has been drinking less caffeine so of course it would make sense that he had replaced one stimulant with another. Ushijima huffs out of frustration as he looks at his boyfriend. Consuming too much caffeine is one thing, but smoking cigarettes is something else entirely. Both habits are unhealthy, but this apparent new one is far worse than guzzling some chemical-ladened sugary drinks. Cigarettes can do permanent damage to the body, and as athletes they are both well aware of that fact. Ushijima cannot rationalize why Tendou would willingly put such carcinogens into his body. 

“Semi does it too, you know. You’re blowing this completely out of proportion,” Tendou finally speaks up, his eyes narrowed and knuckles white as he tightens his grasp on the textbook in his lap. 

Heat rises in his cheeks and suddenly he feels backed into a corner even though Ushijima hasn’t made any moves to come closer to him. Even though it wasn’t like the cigarettes were something that he had hidden away, Tendou feels raw and exposed, like a nerve. The cigarettes were just sitting there and Ushijima could have found them at any time really, but it doesn’t lessen Tendou’s reaction at all when Ushijima calls him out for having them. 

Ushijima sets the pack of cigarettes down on the desk besides him and crosses his arms over his chest, “smoking is bad for you, Satori. You know that.” 

Tendou’s eyebrows fly up into his hairline and his face twists. “So what?” He laughs darkly, waving a dismissive hand in front of him. 

Ushijima stares at the redhead for a moment, unable to understand his reaction. Ushijima can’t comprehend why anyone would willingly partake in something that hurts them, it just doesn’t make sense. He can’t see, let alone fathom, the way that Tendou clings to these things like a crutch. The concept of deriving comfort from tobacco or caffeine or anything “bad” doesn’t even cross Ushijima’s mind as he stands there baffled. 

“What does it even matter? It’s not like you noticed anyways,” Tendou seethes with an unfamiliar venom in his voice, even harsher than the tone he saves for intimidating other players on the court. 

Ushijima blinks rapidly at the redhead. His first thought is that of course he hadn’t noticed, because clearly Tendou must have been trying to hide the cigarettes from him. Otherwise Tendou would have told Ushijima about the cigarettes. That makes sense to Ushijima, but that really isn’t the case. Tendou hadn’t necessarily been trying to hide his smoking habit. In fact, it no longer really was much of a habit at all. Perhaps it had been when he was younger, but the middle blocker had cut back significantly all on his own, without prompting from his health-oriented boyfriend. Truthfully, Tendou only smoked on occasion now that he had reached his third year, only finishing one pack a month at most. 

“Why did you hide it from me?” Ushijima asks, taking a few step forwards towards the bed where Tendou was still sitting. 

“I didn’t,” Tendou reiterates. There is something scalding about his tone that makes Ushijima want to recoil and he can’t make sense of it at all. He has always known Tendou to be protective, but never so defensive. At least not towards himself anyways, as the middle blocker was known to be self-deprecating at times. 

“Satori-” Ushijima presses, still seeking a reasonable explanation for his discovery. 

But Tendou cuts him off, “I didn’t hide anything from you, Wakatoshi.” 

Their eyes meet and the two boys stare at one another for a few beats. Tendou’s eyebrows are furrowed and there is a clear look of anguish on his face but Ushijima has never been good at reading things like that. He waits for Tendou to speak because maybe then something he says will make Ushijima understand, but Tendou stays quiet. 

“You need to quit,” Ushijima speaks up. To him it’s a logical thing to say, something to hopefully push Tendou in the right direction. “Smoking is bad for your lungs, it will hinder your ability to play volleyball. What if Goshiki had seen you smoking? You know how much he looks up to you. He has already started to pick up your bad habits with his caffeine intake. Do you want to set a bad example for our underclassmen?” 

Tendou’s eyes go wide, it feels like Ushijima is accusing him of committing some sort of crime. He would never in a million years encourage Goshiki to smoke. Tendou’s stomach churns at the idea that Ushijima could think so lowly of him. There is a long pause before either of them speaks again. It’s Tendou who finally breaks the silence. 

“I’m going to bed,” he declares even though it’s only seven o’clock in the evening, far too early for the redhead to be going to bed. They hadn’t even gone to the cafeteria for dinner yet. 

Then suddenly, “In the top bunk,” Tendou adds without looking over at his boyfriend. 

Ushijima stands there dumbfounded as he watches Tendou collect his study materials and push himself out of the bottom bunk. Ever since the two boys had become a couple, they had slept together in the bottom bunk. It was an easy fit with Tendou’s slender frame. Ushijima had quickly grown fond of the company and soon it became routine for the pair to sleep side by side. Tendou doesn’t even bother changing into his pajamas and instead just climbs into the top bunk and pulls the blanket over his shoulder, turning so that he is facing the wall with his back to Ushijima. 

“Maybe I should go home,” Ushijima suddenly finds himself saying. 

Usually Ushijima is never one to avoid issues or run, but something about Tendou’s uncharacteristic coldness has thrown Ushijima off his axis. He has seen Tendou be short with annoying underclassmen and even be cruel to opposing players on various occasions, but Ushijima has never seen Tendou appear so unfeeling. What Ushijima doesn’t know, of course, is that tears were slipping down Tendou’s cheeks. Tendou had turned his back not only to shut Ushijima out, but to hide and protect his own emotions as well. Tendou has to hold back a sniffle at Ushijima’s sudden proposal. He swallows the sob that threatens to escape his throat. Instead of answering the wing spiker, Tendou only pulls the covers higher around his shoulders. 

Ushijima doesn’t say anything more. He sends a quick text to his mother saying to expect him home for dinner in an hour and that he will catch the train that runs in thirty minutes. He grabs his backpack and puts in a change of clothes, a pair of pajamas and his toothbrush. He doesn’t need much else. He is just zipping up his bag when his mother replies that it is fine for him to come home, it is a weekend anyways. 

Ushijima pulls his coat on and then grabs his bag. He moves to open the door and glances up at Tendou’s balled up frame in the top bunk. Ushijima opens his mouth to say something, but cannot find his voice. Instead, he leaves wordlessly. On the short walk to the nearby train station, Ushijima tries going over the last few weeks worth of memories in his head, searching for signs that Tendou had been smoking. He comes up with none. This only furthers the wing spiker’s belief that Tendou must have deliberately been hiding the bad habit from him. Ushijima does not consider that perhaps he doesn’t actually know the signs of smoking, nor its withdrawals. 

He gets to the station with about ten minutes to spare before the train arrives. He pulls out his phone and scrolls to Reon’s contact. Reon has always been a good teammate and peer to Ushijima, so the ace determines that Reon would most likely be the best to go to about advice, even though Ushijima has never really asked for advice before. 

“Hey Ushijima, what can I do for ya?” Reon asks, his tone cheery as he picks up the phone. “You know if you have a question or something you can just knock on my door, no need to call,” the other third year laughs. 

“I’m not in my dorm room,” Ushijima explains. Before Reon can ask why Ushijima isn’t in his room, Ushijima gets right to the point. And bluntly at that. 

“I-” Ushijima starts and then pauses for a moment. Reon waits patiently, not prompting Ushijima to say anything until he is ready. “Did you know that Satori smokes?” the brunette asks. 

“Oh,” Reon’s voice falters for a moment. “Yes, I know,” he says a moment later. 

“And Semi too?” Ushijima questions. 

Reon hums, “Mmm.” On the other side of the phone, Reon nods his head. It wasn’t like he was the keeper of Tendou or Semi’s secrets, but he still felt a little awkward being questioned by his friend and captain about their other teammate’s personal habits. 

“How long have you known?” 

“Since first year. Tendou… he doesn’t smoke so much anymore. The two of them used to smoke together a lot during first year. Probably four or five times a week. Sometimes twice a day, it just depended, I guess. I mean, Semi and I were roommates so it was kind of hard not to notice.” 

Ushijima winces. That definitely stings. He feels his chest tighten at the realization that Tendou was right in his accusation, that Ushijima hadn’t noticed at all. 

“Tendou started to cut back a while ago though, I think. He would usually come over to Semi and I’s room and then they’d sneak outside. But Tendou only comes over about once a week now, sometimes not even that much. Semi though…” Reon trails off. 

There’s a long pause. Ushijima tries again to replay the last few weeks in his head, searching for clues that may have indicated that Tendou had been smoking. But Ushijima can’t wrack a single instance from his brain. He hadn’t noticed Tendou slipping out at night, or the scent of cigarettes in Tendou’s hair or the taste of smoke in his mouth. Was Tendou really good at covering that all up? Or had Ushijima not even paid him enough mind? It’s a sinking feeling that makes Ushijima rub a hand over his face as he lets out an exasperated sigh. 

“I don’t understand.” Ushijima admits. “Why would they do something if they both know that it is bad for them?” 

“I’m not really sure. I don’t know if anybody knows, actually. Sometimes things that are bad for us make us feel better, in an odd sort of way, I guess. It’s different for everybody though.” 

“Mmm.” 

“Did something happen? Between you and Tendou?” Reon asks. He is met with silence. Of course something had happened, but Ushijima didn’t know what to call it. It wasn’t a fight per say, or even a disagreement. It was just… upsetting. 

“Well,” Reon starts tentatively, breaking the silence he had created. “I don’t think Tendou was trying to keep anything from you, at least not intentionally. He cares about you too much to jeopardize your relationship, much less your friendship. Try to be patient with him, Ushijima.” 

“Mmm,” Ushijima hums again. “Thank you Reon, I will see you at practice on Monday.” 

“Sure,” Reon replies, glad to have gotten somewhat of a response. “See you on Monday, Captain.” 

The wing spiker ends the call and lets his head hang low until the train approaches only a few minutes later. Ushijima gets on it and goes home, leaving Tendou back at Shiratorizawa and in their dorm room all alone.


End file.
